Le maudit Mo D.

I am paralyzed and superglued to an office chair. My face is fixed into a warm cherubic grimace with Botox. After noting the time, my avaricious partner in realty pushes me down the handicapped ramp into the evening traffic of Loop 360. My smile haunts the minivan driver for the remainder of her days.

This, along with Bob's comment above, is the funniest thing I've seen on the web in the last month. I litterally fell out of my chair laughing.