Okay, I have a lot to blog about.
A's got me thinking about stepparenting, and boy, what a fucking fallacy that is. I always said I would never get involved with a man who had children--like, not even a date. Not even fucking coffee. No way would I ever go anywhere near a man with kids. And I most certainly would never be a step-anything. Living a life where the very fact of your everyday existence is, "Gee, I really wish my husband had more time for me and spent less time with the children he had with another woman. I find everything they do to be utterly revolting and I wish they would just go away, but I can't come out and say that, so instead I will turn into a passive-aggressive bitch-on-wheels and hope that the kids get into good, far-away colleges."
And having been a stepchild, I can also speak to that experience: "Gee, there's this collosal asshole here now calling the shots, and I hate him so much but due to the fact that I am a child I can't say or do much about it but smoke pot and get bad grades and be as big a shithead as possible. And he's insisting that I bend to his retarded rules and seems to really get off on punishing me for things that weren't a problem before he showed up. And I can't even talk to my mother about it because she's torn between her loyalties to me and her loyalties to this asshole."
Sorry, life's too short to get yourself stuck in an untenable situation such as stepparenting. And you're an asshole if you think you can make it work. The only people I know of who like their stepparents are the ones whose stepparents took better care of them than their real parents did. Which is a rare occurrence. I keep hearing horror stories. I have my own horror stories.
Yes, I am saying, if you have kids your dating life should be fucking limited to bowling and the $29.99/night deal at the HoJo and not include plans of marriage until they're out of high school. Had my mother had a rule like that, we'd both be a hell of a lot happier.
A, I feel you pain on this one.
Posted by Zerd at January 7, 2007 02:10 PM