Everyone at some point or another is asked the question, "what would you do with a million dollars?" Well, I'm currently doing the only thing I want to do with a million dollars, which is turning out to cost much less than a million dollars, and that is take a year off to write a novel. But if I had a million dollars, and someday I will (once the evil old hag fucking dies and makes the world a better place), I think what I would do, after taking a bunch of Southwest Airlines package vacations to nonexotic cities of great historic repute like St. Louis, Milwaukee, and Pittsburgh (I'm the cheapest date every), is purchase ridiculously overpriced mail-order baked goods.
After reading about povitica in the back of the Southwest Airlines in-flight magazine (I should also say that I plan to buy Southwest stock with my mil once the subcunt kicks, although I'm sure she'll have it set up so that the lawyers get most of my share and I'll only be left with enough money for a burrito and a drink, if I'm lucky), I really wanted to try it. There is something wonderfully appealing about eastern European pastries, and these rolled-up doughy loaves looked really appealing in the picture. However, it sets one back $22 for one povitica, which is the size of a common loaf of bread. The giant sheet cake at Central Market costs about $22, and in the event it sucks, I won't be too happy at this juncture losing $22 on an exotic eastern European pastry that I really didn't need.
Clearly, I don't have to wait until my inheritence goes through probate to order povitica, but at this point, I might as well. And I'm sure the povitica people will be delighted to hear that an interested potential customer is waiting for someone to die until they purchase their product.
WEIRD WORLD I live in. Dusty one, too. This room needs a dustin'.
I am writing:
1) A monologue
2) A cover letter for a library job that, though is not a prof.lib. position, consists solely of things I like about librarianship and none of the things I don't.
3) A synopsis of my novel, which is harder than writing the novel itself.
4) A novel.
My flickr site has some very funny photos of my husband with a sword, a rifle, and a nunchuk. Go look.
Posted by Zerd at January 9, 2007 02:20 PM