Improv problem. I have an improv problem.
An improblem.
I can't be vulnerable on stage. Even when I am playing and I have made a conscious effort, in my head, leading up to the show, I just can't be vulnerable.
This could be because I dislike vulnerability. But that's not the name of the game.
I get fighty. I hate vulnerability. I hate it in real life. I don't know what it is, but I can't even consciously do it on stage. Or in rehearsals. Or ever. I need an all-challenge rehearsal of just vulnerability.
Poopers.
Last night's show, "Barnyard: The Musical" was really good, though. It ended with a funeral. I didn't like that. I am having major death issues these days. But both shows were outstanding, and well-received by the audience.
I am still thinking about the Trudy's menu item "stuffed avocado." Hugberg let me have a bite of his. It is an avocado (the world's most perfect food) and some chicken coated in batter and deep-fried and then smothered in sauce. I want one. It was the best worst thing I ever tasted.
Posted by Zerd at May 13, 2007 03:18 PMI also get fighty.
Posted by: Shannon McCormick at May 13, 2007 04:22 PMI too, avoid vulnerability in many aspects of my life, thus my grand facilitatrixing of events and parties and when not trying to drive scenes, just plain hanging back to secondary characters which won't have risky emotional journies.
Fucked up much, Jules?
I'm better in rehearsals though.
Why is the big question. Am I so insecure? So distrusting? I'm so "good" at being the person that people rely on, why do I so rarely ask for support on stage or off?
I love seeing vulnerability in people and I try desperately to take good care of it when it is offered to me. Why don't I return that favor?
Anyone? Nevermind.
I'm sorry now especially that I missed the show. My back is fucking killing me.
I will go to Trudy's and split a stuffed Avo with you next week if you want.
Or we could each have one. Either way.