I ran errands with my husband today. I hate shopping. Part of it is that I have the wrong body for mass-produced clothing. Everything looks like shit on me, so long ago I abandoned the notion that shopping and accumulating goods will ever bring me happiness. It only makes me frustrated and angry. That said, I have avoided credit card debt my whole life and the only thing I've ever really splurged on was private college. To the tune of 100K, but my dad posthumously picked up the tab for that. Thanks, Dad.
Anyway, in the midst of all this stressful retard-dodging in the parking lots of northern Travis County, Bob decided the time was nigh to rag on me. "You think you're too good for Chinese buffet!" he told me, accusing me of classism when really my dislike for Chinese buffet has more to do with MSG giving me squirty poop and bad headaches. I explained that, and then he said that my alleged MSG sensitivity was class-based. I forgot to remind him that I once dated a guy whose family owned a Chinese buffet, and they weren't hurting in the money department, so his "Chinese buffet=Power To the People" argument had no legs. He then accused me of having a classism-based disgust with ALL buffets, which is so not true because the member of our dyad who thinks Luby's fucking rocks it sure as hell isn't Bob. That, and Alborz Persian buffet, with their exotic offerings in humble stainless steel trays, is not a lunch option I am going to turn my big Armo schnoz up at.
I then reminded him that I hate conspicuous consumption more than I hate Chinese buffet and would rather chow down on hour-old lo mein than purchase and carry a Gucci handbag, drive a Mercedes, or move to Westlake.
We ended up lunching at Chuy's, Bob's preferred provider of fat calories. Across the street from the N. Lamar location was a gun show. "You think you're too good to attend the gun show!" he exclaimed.
I thought about that statement. "Yes," I agreed. "I do think I'm too good for the gun show."
He kept needling me with "You think you're too good" statements until I fired back with, "Yes, and I think I'm too good to love you."
That shut him up right quick.
Posted by Zerd at December 15, 2007 06:03 PM