Spanish TV is sort of lame. Mexican TV is better, what with the game shows, the titties, and the telenovelas that don't require knowledge of the Spanish language to follow. Espana TV consists of a lot of European shit badly dubbed in Espanol. Production is cheap and there's always some old man with no teeth serving as the butt of some joke I don't get.
However, as my desire to discover and revel in Barcelona is officially over (we go home tomorrow and everything except tourist shit is closed for the second day of log-poop revelry) I have turned on the TV and have located the most RIDICULOUS TV experience ever:
Half the screen is an infomercial for ham. For a mere 220 Euros, this company will send to your house an Iberian ham, an Iberian chorizo, a wheel of cheese, and one of them ham vices. There is a chubby woman demonstrating the ham vice with a telephone number flashing beneath her.
The other half is ads for phone sex! Stills of buxom babes and cut dudes flash with phone numbers and enticing statements such as "CONQUISTAME!" and "Chico y gay!" And, of course, STRIPPERS envia Jorge!"
Bob says that this is the TV station he would create if he were God, since the first order of business when it comes to happiness is the epic choice between ham and sex.
There is a woman dressed in a nurse uniform advertising, "solo escucha mis gritos!"
Another channel has a woman reading Tarot cards on the air, next to a statue of the Virgin Mary.
Bob and I have succumbed to colds and will be coughing, sneezing, and farting our way back to the States starting tomorrow morning 2am Austin time.
Posted by Zerd at December 26, 2007 10:09 AM