My friend Julie did a recent categorical review of her current state of being, which I am going to rip off wholesale herein.
WORK: I've been interning at the offices of the Texas Book Festival. I swear, I am going to do every job that has anything to do with books. My next frontier should be at the Quebecor bindery plant! Anyway, I've really enjoyed working at the TBF. I mostly write e-mails to authors and publicists and am organizing and executing not one but TWO pre-fest parties. I have to find a proper costume, too.
The novel chugs onward. I'm really enjoying writing the second draft. It's like adding flourishes and color to an otherwise black and white picture. I am in need of a new writing group in Austin. But I'm keeping-on, which is important.
Also: inspired by my VSC buddies, I've taken up drawing and painting. I'm taking a drawing class at AMOA which meets Monday nights. I'm not a naturally talented artist, so I have to really work at this, but I can see that in five classes my eye and technique have already improved. I'm into drawing bananas. They have lots of surfaces and are actually harder to draw than they look.
IMPROV: I'm currently performing with Improv For Evil, keeping Bob's spot warm until he comes back. I'm also doing a two-person Bassprov-esque show with Aden that we're calling BATTLE-AXE. We play two old ladies who live together in a retirement community. We've rehearsed once and gone shopping for costumes twice. We have two shows coming up in November and I'm super-excited!
I've also been trying to get over being dissed by GGG. In some ways, I know that it's time to move on and try new things and play with other people who I'm more compatible with (like IFE--I LOVE playing with those guys) But it's profoundly hurtful to have to stomach the notion that people I thought were my friends actually were thrilled when I moved away and actually held meetings to talk about how much I suck when they heard that I was moving back. I know who my detractors are and I look forward to even more awkward face-to-face encounters with them in the future. The truth is, GGG is broken and is not about love or friendship but is run more like a business with no leadership. If there were problems, no one ovaried-up to say anything. Notes were given behind my back and I hear that some armchair diagnoses of my mental state were issued and used as an excuse to keep me out. I'm not the first member they've been shitty to. They do great shows but there's a lot of acrimony and shit-ass girl vibes underneath it all.
Makes me sad, but what am I gonna do?
PTA: I am not a member of the PTA.
KIDS: I have no kids. I am actually happy about this.
BOB: I miss Bob terribly but I am really happy to be back in Austin, even though I don't get nearly enough hugs and kisses these days. Bob really needs to be back here. He's sort of withering up in Shitcago. He still likes his job but now we've entered this phase where things are really much harder for him. He's in the middle of moving into his new smaller apartment, which is two doors down from a Jimmy John's and three doors down from a bar. Bob has also taken up mixology and daydreams about running a tavern. Hopefully in a few months he'll be back in Austin and we can put this shitty experience behind us and be happy again.
MY FUTURE: I'm looking for paid employment. Yeah, so is everyone else. I've enjoyed having all this time to write and I hope my novel is on your bookshelf in two or three years but having a job is nice, too. I still have dreams of running an artist's residency like VSC someday and would love to spend a year working there. I have some ideas swimming around in my head for creative projects. I just want Bob to move back to Austin. That's my main goal these days.
Also: NOVEL!
PERSONAL: I'm doing a lot better in the mental health category. Being out of Chicago is really good for me, as I don't wake up with a sense of interminable dread haunting my days. I'm enjoying a mostly empty house. I don't like a lot of stuff and clutter but that's how Bob lives. I put my posters up on my bedroom wall after five years of not having my posters. Makes me feel 21 again! Also, I've lost about 5 pounds from not eating in restaurants with Bob. Bob is fattening. But I miss him.
I still seek out positive activities and moment of wonder. I embrace melancholy and sadness as a normal condition of existence and do not feel I owe it to people around me to hide these emotions (though some might beg to differ). 2009 SUCKED but 2010 will be much, much better.
ALSO: if you haven't read Steve Hely's HILARIOUS book "How I Became a Famous Novelist," push yourself away from the computer and run to the nearest bookstore and buy it. YOU WILL DIE OF LAUGHING.
YES!
Posted by Zerd at October 21, 2009 12:15 PM